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OUR REVIEW OF THE WATCH
THE WATCH Review transcript
Mark: Harloff and Ellis coming though in the clutch…look at this. He spit his gum out and put it on his BlackBerry.
Kristian: Who cares? BlackBerrys suck, I need an iPhone.
K: We are reviewing a film that came out a long time ago, The Watch starring Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jackie Chan…
M: We are definitely not talking about that one; this is the new The Watch; originally titled Neighborhood Watch but changed for fairly obvious reasons…this stars Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn, Jonah Hill, Richard Amedi-something and whole mess of aliens.
K: What people may not realize until they see the trailer is that this is an alien invasion film…not a spiolier, it’s shown in the previews.
M: It’s not a spoiler to say that, and alien invasion film meets comedy here. Obviously with that cast it’s going for laughs, and in the past this combo has worked well sometimes, and occasionally not-so-well. Howard. The. Duck. And with this one, I was pleasantly surprised. I laughed a lot.
K: It’s not the shitbomb I thought it would be.
M: That’s Kristian being nice.
M: It’s a really good cast, and it’s nice to see Vince Vaughn back in a movie where it’s not just going through the motions and relying too heavily on him; while this isn’t nearly as good as Old School, it has the same feel where the movie uses him well because it makes him part of a larger concept.
K: Everyone in this film uses their schtick, and no one over-does it. Ben Stiller isn’t overly paranoid and annoying; Vaughn does his fast-talk, look at how I explain things quickly but it works.
M: That impression isnt recognizable as Vince Vaughn when you do it…no one would hire you to do that at children’s parties, but I see what you’re doing. Not bad.
K: Jonah Hill also is in it, he touches his face and makes weird sex jokes like he does in everything but it’s not annoying.
M: Ben Stiller is the leader of this Watch group; someone gets murdered where he works at CostCo and things are getting strange…so he forms a Neighborhood Watch to solve this mystery and the only guys who sign up are Vaughn, Hill and Richard…I really wish I could pronounce his last name because he’s very funny in the movie.
K: We saw the billboard for this and were wondering who the hell the guy was, and he is funny but I didn’t like where his charcter went; it felt stupid and over-the-top.
M: I thought it was funny…
K: It was clearly the writers getting into a corner and going back and re-doing some things late in the game…
M: Ah, you think a rewrite? The Cartoon Cat’s brother who has it together for the most part came in late?
K: The first half of this movie will make you laugh a lot, but it’s just not that great and I saw this a few months ago when it was a much better film called Attack the Block. Not nearly as good as that film, there’s no structure and it kinda falls apart.
M: You go into this hoping for some good belly laughs, and almost got that.
K: I went I to this thinking it wasn’t gonna deliver, then a few funny things happen, I’m laughing for a while, but then it becomes: easy joke, saw that coming and it fell apart a little bit. Alien invasion aspect just got silly, and by the end I was like “eh, just get me back to The Dark Knight Rises”.
M: But it did make me laugh, and even though it got untangled towards the end I had fun watching it. I’m gonna give this movie the same score as my mom, who accompanied us to the screening, 3.1 Schmoes. Decimals run in the family.
K: I didn’t hate it, if you watch it on cable you can enjoy it…I’ll go 2.5 Schmoes. This summer, with the exception of a few movies, is really disappointing.
M: You’re gonna do this now?
K: Yeah, we’re almost done and there’s been so few really great films…what do you think Schmoeville?
M: Well, we still have Total Recall, Bourne movie, Expendables 2, we can turn this thing around a little bit.
K: Couple other things; make sure you check out our Dark Knight Rises podcast and this Saturday, we debut a new segment: Scores and Soundtracks!
M: All this new stuff and you’re still in a grouchy mood because every movie this summer hasn’t been great. Don’t put this all on The Watch.
K: I’m not! It was fine, I love Jennifer Love Hewitt.
OUTTROThe Watch Review,